Building a Shared Experience During the Busy Times

How busy are you these days? If you are like most adults in a committed relationship, you are probably juggling work with many other responsibilities, such as school, a second job, parenting, or serving as a caregiver to aging family members. Staying healthy and keeping in touch with friends and family takes up time as well.

That doesn’t leave a ton of time to connect with your partner. While one or two nights a week together to watch a show or do something fun is important, taking even a few minutes every day to intentionally connect  can build intimacy, and significantly bolster the strength of your relationship. I believe that even the busiest couples can develop and deepen a bond by taking a little time every day.

The following are a few ideas that might work for you—some of which you might already be doing:

• Talk about something other than logistics every day. It’s easy for all of us to get bogged down in discussing items related to scheduling, finances, health, the house, kids’ schooling, or whatever else might be happening.

• Share a story or experience that your partner doesn’t know about. A great way to keep things feeling fresh and unpredictable is to share with your partner an experience or story that they’ve never heard.

• Make each other laugh every day. Humor can cut through stress, exhaustion, and even anger, and can transform the mood.

• Hold a short post-dinner dance in the kitchen. Even if it’s one song, try cranking up the salsa, the hip-hop, rock, EDM, jazz, or whatever you two enjoy, and move around. If you have kids, bring them in and create a family dance circle.

• Go on a short early morning or post-dinner walk. When you’re stressed, there’s nothing like being outside and getting some exercise. And being outside with your partner is even better.

• Share small doses of pop culture. It could be as simple as a short, funny youtube video that allows you to experience something new and fun together. A few minutes of laughing together can make a big difference in establishing deep connections and helping you through the busy times.

Life might be stressful and demanding for you and your partner, but there are small ways to build a shared experience along the way.